Learning..

Reading Austin Woman, December 2010, I read a powerful article that interviewed Jaston Williams, who experienced the death of his son in a car wreck in 2005. He wrote about learning to set the search for understanding and context aside...

"So, allow yourself to grieve appropriately and go on. To me grieving forever, and allowing the grief to send me into some cave for the rest of my life, is hardly a fitting memorial to that child and all the amazing things he brought to our lives."

This definitely made me reflect. Maybe I am still searching for understanding and haven't accepted it just may not ever happen...

December 2010.

Another passing of December 19. Two years honoring the last day of my husband's life...

Two years since I heard his voice, telling me how much he loved me... Two years since we wrapped our arms around each other, holding on tight never wanting to let go... Two years since I layed beside him in our bed, feeling the strength of his faith... Two years since I held his hands and watched him leave...

It's been two years without my husband by my side, guiding my path... protecting me, encouraging me... Two years since I lived a life as two, being a wife with a husband who adored her...

Now I sit here at the ocean, watching and feeling the powerful waves... listening to the sounds of God... my heart is still broken...

I search for peace... the strength to find joy, to have dreams for the future...

I search to find meaning in my life... the strength to find my path.

Moments

George Strait offers such wise words...

Life's not the breaths you take
The breathing in and out
That gets you through the day
Ain't what it's all about
You just might miss the point
If you don't slow down the pace
Life's not the breaths you take
But the moments that take your breath away

My life has been blessed by moments that have truly taken my breath away.